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The Curse of Dethklok (episode)
The Curse of Dethklok is the first episode of Season 1 of Metalocalypse . It premiered on Adult Swim as the pilot episode in the tv show's debut, and it is where the band members of death metal band Dethklok first appeared. Synopsis The pilot episode opens with the appearance of Jean-Pierre, who is called by Dethklok in the dining hall (or what looks like it) aboard a Dethcopter on their way to some place. We learn that Jean-Pierre is the most recent of a long line of chefs to be employed by Dethklok for his culinary tastes and skills, as the previous chefs who came before him had died horrible deaths during their service; however Jean-Pierre, who apparently looks very nervous is undeterred by the risks as he would have his brains "scooped out by a melon baller" rather than to miss the opportunity. Suddenly the Dethcopter starts to shake when it flies through a swarm of migrating birds. Jean-Pierre shows the band members a wine bottle given to them by the Prime Minister of Norway as a gift. Nathan refuses it as he never drinks before a concert, but then his bandmates start drinking anyways. The scene now cuts to a news broadcast that Dethklok is traveling perform a "jingle" near the Artic region in Norway to promote their sponser Duncan Hills Coffee and to make coffee "metal", as Nathan had stated in an interview. Fans from around the world are required to sign pain waivers - contracts that will remove any possibilities of lawsuits against Dethklok should something go wrong and lives be lost - in order to see them perform. Meanwhile the Dethcopter releases the box Dethklok is inside, and it parachutes to the intended landing spot on the ground; however it releases itself too early and instead lands on several fans, killing and injuring them. It doesn't stop Dethklok from performing as intended, though, and the concert is an astounding success despite the fans getting scalded by extremely hot coffee when it is poured on them by Klokateers. When a Klokateer releases some fireworks, one of them ricochets into the Dethcopter, destroying it and sending Jean-Pierre into its blades, chopping him up into pieces with blood landing on the watching band members, who are disgusted. Meanwhile a mysterious group calling themselves the "Tribunal" are informed of Dethklok and the concert, which had rival coffee businesses ended up getting driven out by their endorsement in Duncan Hills Coffee. The band members are then introduced by Senator Stampingston as thus in the opening theme of Metalocalypse: *First is Skwisgaar Skwigelf (lead guitarist), "taller than a tree". *Second, Toki Wartooth (rhythm guitarist), "not a bumblebee". *Third, William Murderface (bass guitarist), "William Murderface, Murderface, Murderface". *Fourth, Pickles (drummer), "doodily doo ding dong doodily doodily doo". *Fifth and finally, Nathan Explosion (lead vocalist and frontman), simply, "Nathan Explosion". Cardinal Ravenwood warns the others of an ancient Sumerian prophecy that heavily implies that Dethklok will bring about a global catastrophe similar to that of Armageddon. General Crozier suggests that they be killed immediately, but the leader Mr. Selatcia orders for his little group to wait. Back at Mordhaus, following the demise of Jean-Pierre, the members begin to suspect that whoever they come in contact with, including whoever they employ, are "cursed" to die a horrible death. Nathan suggests that their chefs are cursed due to their demises, but Toki points out that their recent chef is still living, albiet severely dismembered and hooked up to a machine to even stay barely alive. Nathan says that Jean-Pierre will die soon given the time. Pickles finds, to his and his bandmates' astonishment, that the medical procedure costs them 10,000 dollars a day; Murderface suggests "pulling the plug" to keep costs down, but Pickles instead suggests firing him because Jean-Pierre hadn't been cooking for them since his accident. Skwisgaar, who has been trying to put ground coffee beans into a toaster, gets frustrated that no one taught him how to make coffee and angrily slams it into the ground, breaking it. Toki talks about getting depressed about the color of Murderface's book and other personal things, and Murderface starts to rant about how he is always "the fat one", and says that the only good thing about their chef being dead is that he wouldn't be able to get fat from eating too much. Toki says that without someone to cook for them, since they don't know how to cook themselves, they are all going to starve. So Dethklok travels to a grocery store labeled 'FINTROLLS' to get food, where Toki is amazed by the new surroundings. Skwisgaar tells him that the grocery store is a "food library", but Pickles, irritated because of low blood sugar, yells at them that it is a grocery store and calls them douchebags, but then apologizes. Nathan then tells them to get the food listed on the papers he gave them, and tells them to not buy only booze because it is not food. Murderface, miffed, says that he would rather cut off his penis than give up booze, which surprises Toki. After the band members go their seperate ways, Nathan goes to the meat department and breaks the glass casings with his head in order to get some sausages, which gives him several cuts and imbeds some pieces on his face and arms. Murderface asks an old woman if there are olives in lemon tarts (as stated in his list), and when he gets a disgusted response, he decides to urinate on the olives. Pickles, having had filled his cart with wine and beer bottles, asks a store clerk if booze is good for soup. The clerk says "No", but Pickles assumes that it is a "Yes" and goes on. Meanwhile, while shopping with Skwisgaar, Toki asks him what walnuts are. Skwisgaar slips a box of tampons into his cart and taunts Toki about being a lady. Annoyed, Toki calls him a lady and Skwisgaar angrily denies that he is. In another aisle, Nathan tries to measure two cups of uncooked rice and pours said amount into his shopping cart, but it falls onto the floor, and he calls it "brutal". Pickles asks the clerk at the seafood department if lobsters, if put in boiled water, shrink, turn red, and die. When the clerk says "yes", Pickles admits that it is the most "metal" thing he ever heard. Then the rest of the band members hear Nathan, who is playing around with the intercom, over the loudspeakers, much to their amusement and horrifying several shoppers. Meanwhile Skwisgaar flirts with an old lady shopper by explaining the term "G-MILF". After arriving back at Mordhaus, in the kitchen Nathan finds out from Toki that they have left all the food back at the grocery store, so Dethklok goes to the infirmary to try get Jean-Pierre to cook for them, to no avail. A dejected Murderface suggests committing suicide, but Skwisgaar suggests sewing their chef back together. Toki points out that since neither of them are good at sewing things, Jean-Pierre is going to be "sewn back together wrong". Nathan overhears and suddenly comes up with an idea for a song. Said song is used in the credits while over in the Dethcopter, a newly sewn back and alive Jean-Pierre walks into the dining hall, revulsing the band members with his hideous appearance. Guest Voices *James Hetfield *Kirk Hammett Trivia *It should be noted that in the pilot episode Toki's voice is much deeper than the normal, high-pitched one during the rest of the episodes of Metalocalypse. *"Rotted Body Landslide", "Every Bone Broken", and "Hammer Smashed Face" are all said over the loudspeaker in the grocery store by Nathan, and are all songs by Cannibal Corpse. Category:Episodes Category:Season 1